I have been on several Tinder dates within the last two years. In fact, I met my last boyfriend on Tinder (it didn’t work out, but he’s a great guy and we continue to be friends).
Before I downloaded the app I was very “don’t knock it until you try it,” and believe me, I have tried it over and over again. I am the classic download, delete, and re-download girl. And yes, I tried Bumble at one point in time too.
I will share with you my consciences about the app. I don’t entirely enjoy it….*shocking eh?*
Tinder is just not for me. I am too much of a hopeless romantic to really enjoy swiping away at my potential fate, and having my own judgement of physical appearance determine if any of those guys are my future “the one.”
I know plenty of people who are happily dating (even engaged) to their Tinder matches, but unfortunately my dating app life has not lead to any long-term happily ever afters. Maybe you can relate?
Dating apps make me feel superficial
I tend to swipe on the stereotypical “hot guys” and swipe away the guys who would actually be the type of guy to bring home to your parents, to meet the family, and have a long-term, healthy relationship with.
I have a theory that when you log into the app, the top guys with the most “swipe rights” are shown first. Immediately it forces you to think this newly downloaded dating app is better than the others because you think to yourself, “where have all these Liam Hemsworth look-a-likes been all of my life?” But after a few hours of swiping right on the “hottie mchotties”, you soon end up with an endless supply of men who are actually in your league, and are not just “gods” with big muscles and made in Australia.
It Gives A Short-Term Confidence Boost
In my experience I found that having a dating app only gives you a short-term confidence boost. It is great to get matches especially with those who you consider “out of your league” but, then it gets real-old real-quick when you do not get a response, or when someone “ghosts” you out of nowhere. Those lack of responses hurt me, even though I have never and will never meet that person. Their choice to decline my message is a reflection of my physical appearance and some made up bio? No thanks, not worth my time or my confidence.
I Have A Fear of Swiping Away My Future Husband
This often would cross my mind. What if I swiped away my dream guy because I was too superficial to “swipe right?” Like I said above, I am too much of a hopeless romantic for this stuff. I would like to think I will meet the perfect guy through my own two eyes than on the pixels of my cell phone screen while swiping late at night before bed.
Most people aren’t looking for a relationship
This is true from my personal experience. Sad, but true. I have gotten a lot of “hey what are you looking for on here?” and unfortunately when I say anything OTHER THAN ‘casual hook-up’ I get a “oh too bad, we could of had fun together” response. Bye bye. Sorry. I am too mature for some side fling with an app dude. Do not get me wrong, I have had a few dates with those “flingers”, but let me tell you it is a trap and they don’t want to just wine and dine you….if you know what I mean.
So ladies and gentlemen, if you find that a dating app is adding nothing to your life then I suggest you delete it. Permanently. You will come across someone in real-life and they will sweep you off your feet. I promise.
Do not think that this is the only way to meet someone because it isn’t. People still exist in the world in front of you, you just have to be patient and live your life without worrying about finding that significant other. I have been told many times that “they come into your life when you least expect it”, and I truly believe that timing is everything.
Feature photo cred: https://unsplash.com/@chadmadden
4 thoughts on “What I’ve Learned From Using Dating Apps”
Great post Liv! The right guy is out there for you-I just know it!
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Thank you Myah! 🙂 I know I’ll find him one day too, when I least expect it!
I have loved your piece of writing. Some people are just like 80 year olds in a body of a 22 year old. Some do trust old school love and don’t want Sacred Games.
Thank you!! 🙂